Clare Henney: Funny Signs

12:00 PM | | Posted by Clare Henney

It’s crazy how many funny signs are out there, especially here in the Philippines. I don’t know how many times I’ve spotted them but there have been more than I can count with my hand. It’s too bad that I have not been able to take photos of all of them but here are some that I do have:

This one was a ROFL moment for me. We were discussing at work that we needed OPEN and CLOSED signs for our door because people still kept coming in after office hours or during lunch breaks.

My superior, in her not-so-superior glory, had this sign made. I wonder who exactly she’s close to.  I love how the word CLOSE is right smack center and in all caps.  I pointed out the mistake and although it would have been easy to paint a D after the word CLOSE, she didn’t have it done and had us buy one of those signs you can flip over from National Bookstore instead.  Hilarious!

Here’s another sign, this time from a vacant lot on one of the main roads that we pass through regularly for work.  It says: NO TRISPASSING.  PRVITE PROPETY (with the R under an arrow between E and T).

I don’t know about you guys, but this seems like a text shortcut gone wrong with a mix of spelling errors included.  And I guess they finished painting before they realized that they forgot the R in the word PROPERTY so they decided to add that tiny arrow to say that this was included in the word. Now this one reminds me of a blog entry from Lourd De Veyra, which was also a part of his book, This is a Crazy Planets.

The painted on sign (right by a Globe Telecom tower) says:  Bawal Umihi D2! Putol t*t*! (I’m sure you get what the asterisk is for).  Note also the arrow indicating just where it is not allowed to pee (not that anyone should pee in a public place like that in the first place).

Lourd De Veyra said it best in his blog:

The fact that it even exists is troubling.

It presupposes that in the said area someone has previously committed a horrible crime against the civilized world. Equally disturbing is the possible degree of frequency involved. It means that colonic discharges might be a common occurrence. Once — forgivable. But two or more? “I’ve had it with these mutherfuckers!” we can only imagine the angry proprietor storming out of the house with a can of spray paint in hand.

This brings me to my last photo. Why does a sign like this even exist?  To have the tree with a sign (in the first person) asking that it not be watered? Why?  Does someone keep on watering it without permission (if yes, why)?  And how did the tree even cut a part of itself to make the paper so it could write the sign (OK, so I’m not serious about that but you get what I mean right)? Hay…as Lourd De Veyra’s blog title suggests, This is a Crazy Planets!